by Belinda Lams

What used to work doesn't work. 
What used to fit doesn't fit. 


I noticed that my mint plant has been shriveling quickly after watering.  As a novice gardener, I FINALLY realized there may be a problem with the roots.  


I lifted up the container to investigate underneath.  Sure enough, I discovered the roots desperately reaching out through the holes. They had outgrown their current container and went on a mission to find nourishment. 

Common sense says it's time to transplant the mint into a larger container with fresh soil. (No, I haven't done it yet. Why would I listen to someone named Common Sense?) 

How many times do we try to force ourselves to stay in a container that just doesn't fit anymore?  Whether it's a role, a job, a dynamic, a relationship, a pattern, a belief, a paradigm?

Clearly, my mint plant will die if I don't give it the room it needs to expand and develop.

What about you? 
Where do you need to make room for yourself in your life?

by Belinda Lams

FIND WHERE YOUR SPIRIT DWELLS...AND FEED IT

I've been walking past this sign for a week now. It's posted on a marquis at the corner church/synagogue that I pass on my way to the gym. 

It got me thinking...We all feed our body, right? If we don't get nutrition, we get depleted, sick, and eventually die. Ok. That's obvious.

(I just heard of models eating cotton balls and tissue to fill their stomachs. REALLY????!!!!!)

Now our soul, our inner being, is more subtle than our body. Harder to find. Maybe that's why the sign says to find where it dwells. Maybe that's why so many people don't nourish their inner lives.

We have a hunger, a longing, but it can be quickly staved off by filling up on some cotton ball activities.  There's always an empty substitute available.

If we keep doing this, we will end up with soul anorexia. We will become the busy, distracted, walking dead.

What nourishment does your soul need? It may not be the same meal all the time.  What does it need right now?

We must feed our souls to thrive.  
We must find our souls to feed them. 
We must make time to find our souls...every day.

by Belinda Lams

The other day, I was about to walk past the 99-year-old father of my friend. I said a passing hello, when he grabbed my arm and stopped me in my tracks. I've had conversations with this gentleman in the past, but none as intent as this one. 

He said in his thick Hungarian accent, "Do you know how old I am?" 

"Yes," I replied.  "You're 99."

He continued, "That's right. I want to make it to 100.  I'm almost there."  

I politely tried to excuse myself and move on with my original objective, but he insisted on keeping me there. He told me about his life, about his wonderful son and three granddaughters...all the while firmly gripping my arm and looking deeply into my eyes. I finally succumbed to his wishes and shifted my attention to being present and listening well.  It was as if he desperately needed me to know his story. 

I just found out that he passed away. He didn't make his 100th birthday. 

A wise friend of mine said that when people are on their way out (aware of it or not) they are often compelled to tell their story. It's as if the soul knows it's going to leave soon.  (Beverly apparently did the same thing before she died. See my previous blog "What Death Teaches About Life").

If the soul knows it's going to leave and wants to be known before it departs, then perhaps the story we're writing with our lives is even more important than we realize.

Something in us wants to leave a legacy. We want to know that our life mattered.

What is the story you want to write with your life? What is the legacy you want to leave behind? What are you willing to do about it?

by Belinda Lams

I went to Beverly's funeral yesterday. She had lived a good, long life, but her sudden death was shocking and unexpected. 

A friend sitting next to me during the service said that she would let Beverly's life remind her to seize each moment. She wouldn't wait until tomorrow to say or do the things that mattered to her.  She often waits.

Out to the gravesite, dirt being shoveled on top of the white box, a young mother said that she would keep this as a reminder to connect with her children. She gets caught up in the hustle bustle of daily life.

I was again reminded why I do what I do with my life. 

I too had the lesson at a funeral years ago. I also made a decision to make each day count.  I didn't want the hustle bustle to be my excuse. I wanted to ensure that it wouldn't take another funeral to wake me up.  

So I built it into my life's work.

I vowed to help other people find their deep desire and purpose and live it out each day. While I help them, they help me, and together we keep the lesson alive. 

This little quote sits on my desk. I found it right after my daughter died.

"Many people don't know that there are angels whose only job is to make sure you don't get too comfortable and fall asleep and miss your life." -brian andreas

What keeps you awake?

by Belinda Lams

I have a friend who is embarking on a new chapter of her life. She is in the process of packing up her house to move to another state within a month's time.  There are so many quick decisions to make: finding a new place to live , hiring a moving company, should she sell her car, etc...

Time, space, and money are the boundaries...helping her make the decisions about what she can and can't do. I'm watching her whittle down her belongings to the essentials. Purge. Pack.

What are those things she wants to take forward into this next part of her life? What are the things she wants to leave behind?

If you were pressed to make a decision right now, what would you pack? What would you purge?
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What are 3 things you want to take forward in your life? 
What are 3 things you want to leave behind?

(They don't have to be physical items)

Please share your answers below.